Friday, September 12, 2008

Dear Mister Coffeemaker

What has happened to us?  In the years we've been together, you've always been reliable and hot.  But now things are getting . . . lukewarm.  When we first met you stated quite clearly that with proper care, we'd last forever.  I believed you.  I even left my old MC for you.  You won me over so completely.  And I've done everything right.  Why aren't you hot for me anymore?  You know how much I like it like that.   Do you want me to go and find another, younger, hotter Mister Coffee?  Is that it?  It's like you don't even care anymore.  I'm sorry, I can't keep doing this every  morning, trying to make the relationship work, hoping that this time things will be different.   I'm gonna have to let you go.  But it's not like you care.   I hate you for this. 

11 comments:

Michelle Miles said...

LOL!!!

Dharma Kelleher said...

Perhaps it's time to leave the drip behind and get hot and steamy with an espresso machine.

LeeAnn Flowers said...

Love it!! :D

David said...

Mrs. Tea died during the night, while I was asleep. I realized what had happened when nothing I did turned her on.

That was traumatic.

S. E. Ward said...

Might I be able to set you up with a shiny stainless steel electric kettle? Sure, he's got a stodgy, old-fashioned reputation, but wait until you see him. He has totally updated everything about himself, and did I mention how willing he is to experiment? Coffee, tea, instant hot chocolate. He can even boil your eggs, nudge nudge, wink wink. You can turn him on with the flip of a switch, and you're guaranteed near-instant satisfaction.

H. L. Dyer said...

Just be careful with those new, hot Mister Coffees... I've been burned before. :)

Pamala Knight said...

Hey, I don't feel sorry for MC--he brought this upon himself. I say, off to the new HOTTER MC, pronto. LOL!

Thanks for the giggle.

Kelly Gay said...

LMAO, you guys! :D

jax said...

It's a sign to pick up a new, HOT number! :)

I would freak out if my coffeemaker stopped working.

PS. Yes, Wilmington, NC. :)

D~ said...

Just stumbled across your great blog. I had to tell you that it gave me a good chuckle before heading to sleep! I hope you are able to replace him with .. one that lasts longer!
I wish you all the best with your book, it sounds like an amazing read.

D~

Kelly Gay said...

Thanks for the kind words, D. :)

And YAY, Jax, on the Wilmington thing!